The four-week itch...

They say when you do long(er) term mission trips, that the first 4 weeks are the easiest. You are excited and happy and learning new things and meeting new people. Things are great. They say the second four weeks you loose the “honeymoon” feeling and get rather annoyed, angry, lonely, sad, and question why you are here. I have officially ended my first 4 weeks here in South Africa, and I can say that so far, the second four weeks have been identified correctly. Now, don’t get me wrong, I am not unhappy, but I find myself getting annoyed at little things and roommates, crying a little more often than usual, and a little restless. I know with all of my heart that this is where I am suppose to be and I have already seen God move in my life and in the lives of the other volunteers and the people we have had the chance to work with, but, if I’m honest with myself, and you all, I must tell you that I am struggling a little bit. I know WHY I am here and know that God has called me here, but I struggle with the feeling of uncertainty, of things not being clear, of things not being the way I think things should be. Which leads right back to another entry I wrote a few weeks ago—that I must not forget—this trip is not about me at all and I can’t seem to get that through my head. I get so wrapped up in myself and the stupid little things that don’t go my way, or running out of starbucks coffee, or not having privacy…We are called to not be conformed to this world, but to be transformed by the renewing of our minds….man, I need to have a huge piece of humble pie and remember that!

Ok, so enough venting and complaining….so, we are officially done with training for the projects and are starting our individual projects this week that we will have for our duration here! I can’t tell you how excited I am! Here is what I will be doing: On Monday’s I will be working with Kangaroo moms. This is a project where women who have had premature babies are kept in the hospital (alone) and their babies are strapped to them until they are able to go home. These women have no one. All alone and no attention, so we will be going in and spending some good, quality girl time with them and sharing the love of Christ. Then, Monday afternoons, I get to be part of the SOS teen’s program. SOS is a village where kids/teens live because they are orphaned. Such a cool place and the kids just crave love an attention. So we go in and build relationships, hang out, and teach life skills and bible studies. Tuesdays I will be going to the New Life center. This is a so-called “safe house” for women who are pregnant, and have decided to give their baby for adoption instead of abortion. These women, yet again, are alone and some of their families don’t even know they are there. They stay here for the duration of the pregnancy and get to opportunity to choose their child’s adoptive parents. Our job is to, again, be there for them and remind them that no matter what God still loves them. Wednesdays we spend the day in Kylemore…this is a place in the mountains of SA and has a variety of projects there. My main focus will be working in the schools there—but there are other things such as a Creche (day care center) and then a soup kitchen. Thursdays (depending on the week) I will be working either at Belhar High School teaching life skills classes with some other volunteers or I will be working at a local hospital doing counseling for women who are pregnant (again, all alone) and deciding on if adoption is good for them. We pray with the women and just talk to them. They really don’t have anyone else to talk to about anything or to give them the proper guidance. Some of the stories that come from these women are horrible. Just a preview, a 17-year-old young girl was raped by 4 men…she is faced with a choice…one of adoption or one of abortion. Heavy stuff!! But to just know that I will be able to have a part in so many different people’s lives is so rewarding and gives me hope and peace in my times of struggling.

I realized today that I only have about 2 months left here in South Africa. In the long run, that is nothing! I’m running out of time and it’s time to get busy J

Keep the prayers coming, especially for strength, peace, guidance, courage, understanding, and knowledge. I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for your love and prayers and support! Thank you from the bottom of my heart!

Blessings from South Africa,

Shawna